There they were, in their usual spot in the back of the sanctuary, snickering and talking about whatever boys talk about, and I had to walk past them to get out of the sanctuary. I didn’t have to, there was another aisle that led right to the door, but it was a rather “frightening” game my sisters, girlfriends, and I would play. I was about 6 or so, and those boys, as far as I was concerned (even though I did have what you would call a crush on one of them. Shocking, I know!), were monsters. Not that they were fierce or mean, but they were just plain scary to the mind of a 6 year old girl. We would dare one another to walk past them, and walk we would, trembling in our patent leather church shoes. The boys wouldn’t say anything. They just continued talking about whatever they were going on about, completely ignoring the foolish girls walking past them. But what a dramatic event we had just gone through. “We made it!” we would say, “And the boys didn’t do a thing!” And on we would skip without a care in the world, until we forced ourselves to do it again.
Years past, and I grew out of that silly, girlish fear. Or so I thought.
One afternoon recently, I was browsing the comments on a post someone had put up on Facebook about a certain article encouraging people to embrace the older, vintage if you will, form of dating. My family doesn’t agree with dating. Period. So I was reading the comments with a great deal of skepticism and prejudice (not a good thing). One of the commenters gave a completely reversed example of what would normally be, for our family, “how the relationship starts”: Instead of the guy being interviewed by the father of the daughter, the daughter was interviewed by her parents, verifying her standards, and what she would and would not do when she was out on a date with her “boyfriend”. I was mortified! Not only that, I was fuming! The girl being interviewed?! And the guy doesn’t even have to ask the father’s permission, let alone meet him face to face?! If anything went wrong it would be the guy’s fault, not the girl’s, so why on earth would she have to be interviewed?! Right? Right?
I was afraid of something that didn’t exist!!! And I didn’t even know it! I would be fine being around young men, but when it came to talking about them, boy, was I prejudiced!
So what did I do? I repented. I repented of my fear and my lack of trust in God. I repented of my prejudice and bigotry against those who had a different opinion than me on the topic of courtship, dating and relationships. I prayed and asked God to help me see past my childish fear and embrace the truth of His word, and love my brothers in Christ as what they are: brothers.
I am not perfect. I know I have a long way to go before I even come close to being a shade of Who Christ Is. I never shall even be able to partially reflect His Glory and Majesty until that day when I see Him Face to Face in our heavenly home. But until that day, each hour brings opportunities, and in these opportunities there are trials, and in these trials, sanctification. Each prejudice the Lord helps me see, I pray He will help me to overcome. Each sin He reveals in my life, I pray He will give me the strength to battle and crush it to the ground. And I can, because Christ did. And I will, by His grace, until the day I die.
CREDITS // Author: Brigid Boyer; Photography: Charlotte Boyer